New Year is always a fun time for me. I have friends and family around, and in recent years I have been able to celebrate with them in Africa.
Last night I went to a national gala in Uganda. King, ministers, and all entertainment stars of Uganda were there. I’ll tell you more about it soon.
Tonight I’m going to a dinner party big family we have in the New Year’s Eve. Before that, I have a little downtime. So I am writing to you, then I will do nothing and allow myself to be a bit boring.
Let me tell you what I mean by that and how I think it can help you too.
I brought a small book, a friend gave me. Robert Carlson is do not sweat the small stuff … and everything is small matter.
is full of small pieces of 245, useful tips on how to be more in tune with the present and with his life as it is lived. There are so many good tips in it that I like to pick it up and remind myself from time to time.
I like the book because it is consistent with my belief that we can and must regain control of our bodies from all distractions forced on us.
Because the fact is that distraction has become very bad in the modern world. We use our brain to disconnect from what our bodies are feeling. We take our brains elsewhere through television or music, or “busy.”
Carlson has lots of good advice about this. But he says two things in his book that were particularly useful. For me, that they are not intuitive. In other words, he would not have gotten them without the book.
The first is allow bored .
bored think that as a negative, and we are told that allowing yourself getting bored is a kind of step toward laziness, so we want to resist before it happens.
comes home, and as soon as you get home to start opening the mail. Then say, “Oh, I have to clean these dishes from this morning,” and then go to turn on the TV, then go to look and see what is in the document …
sequence things to occupy yourself and think you have to have something to “do.”
But Carlson has a surprise. It is said a trial, and see what happens when you say, “OK, well, I’ll just do anything and not worry if I’ll be boring, just to feel the feeling of being bored and see how long I can take it. “
Something strange happens. You’re just bored for a moment, then it becomes relaxation.
It is said that if you get beyond what he says: “It has nothing to do,” he will allow himself to sit. It requires nothing except that just left.
Do not do one thing after another, do not try to think too much. Do not try to do anything. Only for. And the benefits are extreme.
When I tried it, of course, that never really bored. I flirted with the idea of being boring, but instantly transformed into an entry point that allowed my mind to stop. I was completely at ease.
It was very useful.
The other thing I’ve learned from your book that I would not have thought was that he told feel comfortable not knowing .
He tells the parable of a farmer who goes to his wise people and says frantically, “My ox has died and I have no animal to help me plow my field! That is not the worst thing that could ? have happened “
The old sage replied:” maybe so, maybe not. ”
He went back to the wise man to apologize. “You were right. Losing my ox was not the worst. Otherwise, I never would have gotten my new horse. Now I see that the loss of my ox was the best thing that could have happened”.
The wise man replied once again, “Maybe so, maybe not.”
The farmer thought that the wise man was definitely crazy now.
A few days later, the farmer’s son was riding the horse and was thrown out. He broke his leg and would not be able to help with the harvest. Oh, no, thought the man. Now we will starve.
The farmer went to the wise. This time, he said, “How did you know that capturing my horse was not a good thing? You were right again. I’m sure this is the worst thing that could have possibly happened. You must accept this time.”
the wise man calmly looked at the farmer and in a compassionate tone replied once again, “maybe so, maybe not.”
Enraged that the wise could be so ignorant, the farmer stormed back to town. The next day troops arrived to take every able-bodied men for the horrible war that had just broken out. the farmer’s son was the only young man in the village who do not have to go. Live while others die.
The farmer wanted to force the wise man say he knew the consequence of what happened each time was better than the best or worst. But the wise know that you can not do that because you never know what will come next.
often they try to force what we know about a situation, when we really have no way of knowing. Just be comfortable with not knowing and make the best of it.
What we do have is the ability to feel what is happening within us a much more complete and detailed than most of us imagine. Only usually we can not, because we are so distracted.
I think if you can afford to slow down and get bored, and be comfortable not knowing, you will have a happier and healthier life new year.
To your good health,
Al Sears, MD